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Tag: Satire

Story: A Model Abuser

Posted on May 19, 2008October 17, 2022 by David Barker

It’s amazing how different a bus ride can be depending on the time of day and the day of week. Ride the bus in the morning on a week day and it’s full of tired students on their way to high school and sober-looking grownups on their way to work.

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Story: Alien Rednecks

Posted on April 25, 2008October 17, 2022 by David Barker

I kin heah Jeb comin’ from a million miles away—or at least I kin heah his ATV. I’m standin’ jus’ in from the road when he come out from the cornstalks agrinnin’ ‘n’ awavin’ like a fool, him with his dawg, Gopher, runnin’ behind.

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Story: My Name is URL

Posted on April 11, 2008October 17, 2022 by David Barker

Frank liked his new computer. His son Jimmy bought it for his 65th birthday. It came fully loaded—and with all the peripherals to boot. It had a fast CPU and a big flatscreen monitor. You could listen to music or watch a movie on it, scan pictures, run them off on a nice colour printer, record your voice, chat on the webcam. It was a real beauty.

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Story: The Obituary

Posted on March 25, 2008October 17, 2022 by David Barker

When I answered the phone, a nondescript male voice asked for mister Winter. I said he was out and asked if the caller cared to leave a message. The nondescript male voice gave a name and said he was calling from Factory Casket Wholesalers. He understood a need had arisen in mister Winter’s household.

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Story: The Beetles

Posted on March 11, 2008October 17, 2022 by David Barker

The cop motions me over to the curb in front of number twenty-two. He’s a funny-looking creature in a Kevlar shell whose precise movements give the impression he’s still doing drills at the police academy. He skitters to the car as I roll down the window.

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Story: The Book

Posted on February 25, 2008October 17, 2022 by David Barker

It’s a beautiful summer’s day, so I go to the park with a book tucked under my arm. There’s a mature shade tree—a willow—standing near a bend in the creek. Its branches arch high overhead in a broad canopy and their ends swing low, almost sweeping the ground.

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Story: The Green Capsule

Posted on February 11, 2008October 17, 2022 by David Barker

They give me a green capsule and tell me it contains a radioactive isotope. I swallow it and wait in the reception area until they call my name and lead me to a special room. They leave me alone to put on a gown.

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