NewNorthByNorthWest Inc., a publisher of literary classics for use in secondary school curriculum, has announced that a new edition of Shakespeare’s Merchant of Venice is in the works and is expected to be available in time for the 2011/12 school year. A staple of English curriculum even a generation ago, Shakespeare’s tale of love and usury has appeared in fewer and fewer English programs as parent teacher associations increasingly raise objections to the work.
Richard Small, senior VP of NewNorthByNorthWest Inc., acknowledged concerns about flagging sales. He has enlisted the help of Harry Balle, associate professor of English literature at Syracuse University. Prof. Balle stated: “It really boils down to one word. If we could find a politically correct alternative, parents wouldn’t raise such a stink about it every year.” Small admits that self-righteous semi-literate parents can be a real pain in the ass, and he hopes Balle’s proposal will shut them up for a while.
The troubling passage comes in Act 3, Scene 1 when Shylock (who happens to be Jewish) says: “If you prick us, do we not bleed?” As Prof. Balle pointed out with a wry smile, the word “prick” has always been a thorn in the side of educational publishing. “We hate to admit it,” he said, “but Shakespeare could be really insensitive at times.” Proposed alternatives included “nick” “cut” “slice” and “lacerate”. In the end, focus groups comprising students, teachers and parents, agreed that “nick” was the best choice. It retained the same ick–ness of the original without its offensive connotation.
Small has promised to bring the same care and attention to other educational texts. Next on the list is Shakespeare’s Othello, which, historically, has also attracted attention from parent teacher groups concerned about the play’s racial content. “Othello was a n–I mean a person of colour,” says Small. He promises that in his edition, Othello will be white so parents and teachers won’t have to worry about dealing with issues that make them feel uncomfortable. “And don’t even get me started on A Midsummer Night’s Dream. It’s full of faeries, for crissake.”
Inspired by this sanitary publisher.