According to the New York Times, an estimated 700 evangelical churches in the U.S. have mixed martial arts ministries. Yes. Rub your eyes and read that again. There are churches that try to attract new members by holding fight clubs. These churches are predominantly white, and promote a religiously mediated masculinity that sees the man as strong, dominant, the head of the family.
This upsets me for two reasons:
1) It was my idea first. They stole my friggin idea. Three years ago I had proposed a fight club of the soul. Of course, back then, I imagined myself pitted against 5 foot nothing 90 pound Simone Weil, so it probably never caught on because, when I went to throw her against the ropes, she went sailing out the door. But still. The nerve!
2) These mixed martial arts fight-club Christians are just a bunch of sissies. If you’re going to do something, don’t do a half-assed job of it. There should be an after party with hookers for Jesus and coke dealers for Christ. Why not? After all, Jesus was a party animal.